Japanese Girl Online wants to Marry me

[josolopSon3]

Ok guys, i voice chatted to this Japan girl living in Jpan.
She's pretty and a very beautiful voice she has. She's really nice and i could see my self dating her cause she accepted my personality( i'm a shy guy by the way)

Thing is she wants to move to America and says that Japan is Boring . Meanwhile i like japan and i like studying about it. So that was kind of sad she thinks Japan is boring.

Anyways, i guess she's just saying that. I'm sure she doesn't mean she hates it to death.

Well the problem though, is that I'm not a typical American rich or well off guy. First of all im not white, second I'm living with my parents cause i haven't been able to find a job, and third even when i do get a job and move out.... i can probably just get a room!! at most. Apartments are like 900 dollars and up. With my 9 to 5 job( low wage), i don't think i can even afford that.

Or is it possible? Please share your knowledge.
Also, if i have here here in CAlifornia and we get married..she still can't work because she still doesn't have sufficient English skills. She's just a beginner.

Any tips or ideas? How should i approach this?

By the way i'm still not gonna marry her yet. Maybe in 4 years or something when i have money

 

[Heat6Jones]

where'd you meet her? i want a japanese bride

 

[josolopSon3]

In a Chat/Voice chat( Skype). It's rare to meet Japanese in therethat want to move to the USA and marry you . But it has happened to me about 3 times. The first 2 had some mental illnesses so i knew i should stay away from them. But this new one is normal and really nice.

Well it helps also if you speak Japanese. My bad japanese is sufficient enough. She still doesn't know English that well. She's just a beginner.

 

[Gemeines]

Just curious, but how does "not being white" hinder you?

If she likes you she likes you...

Besides I bet Asian girls like black dudes better than us crazy crackers.

 

[porkar]

I don't know about USA rules on migration/marriage visas but I presume it is as difficult or more so than Australia.
1. There is probably a visa application fee just to see if she gets approval.
2. To work, I am sure she would need a 'green card'.
3. You say you have no work, how are you going to support her if she has no job?
4. There is an airfare just to go there.
5. Unless she is rich and wants to fork out all the money for it I suggest you forget it, or regret it - for the rest of your life.

 

[Sakunyuusha]

If you don't speak Japanese well, and she speaks English even worse, it's really quite difficult for me to see this working out -- because it means you two hardly know one another, and that's never a good thing going into a long-time relationship, never mind thoughts of marriage.

When a girl can't speak the language and already wants to marry you, to me it screams two things. Back in the day, the order would have been flip-flopped, but nowadays it seems like the woman is usually either ...

#1. after USA citizenship. Never mind all that visa nonsense people were talking about. US law has a security clause for mothers of natural-born American citizens that states that the government will not remove the mother from her child without serious cause. Being an illegal alien (unlike in Japan!!) usually isn't enough to cut it in most cases. It's why so many people cross the border from Latin America when the mother is already expecting. It's so that even if they get caught, if she goes into labor on American soil, bam: her kid's a natural-born citizen of the US of A.

It's easy to imagine the girl asking you to fuck her and you saying "YES PLEASE! " And in that moment of stupidity, she gets pregnant and she dumps you. Kid is born 9 months later, kid's an American citizen, she gets to stay because she's the kid's mom, and you have to pay child support because she can prove (quite easily nowadays, yay genetics!) that you're the father.


#2. "She" is not really a Japanese girl at all. "She" is an older adult pedophile looking to meet up with you and [NOT GOOD! X_X].

 

[aquamarine]

Let's not forget that Japanese women have hidden agendas. She WILL expect you to father a child VERY soon after getting married. Hope you enjoy 'real adulthood', not having the luxury of beating off in your room to cartoons and having to deal with the mood swings that only a Japanese woman can bring up.

I know nearly a dozen couples in Canada, the USA, England and Australia where the man (from said country) married a Japanese girl. They were each EXPECTED (with one exception) to help her pump out a child within the first year of marriage. All but two of those dozen are now in effectively sexless marriages and are miserable because they brought their girlfriend/wife back to their home country. Good luck on ya mate, I dodged that bullet twice already and realized that Japanese women are the worst for forcibly settling you down from anything but family. This may come off as harsh, but living with a wife is a LOT different than living in mommy and daddy's house...

 

[josolopSon3]

If you don't speak Japanese well, and she speaks English even worse, it's really quite difficult for me to see this working out -- because it means you two hardly know one another, and that's never a good thing going into a long-time relationship, never mind thoughts of marriage.

When a girl can't speak the language and already wants to marry you, to me it screams two things. Back in the day, the order would have been flip-flopped, but nowadays it seems like the woman is usually either ...

#1. after USA citizenship. Never mind all that visa nonsense people were talking about. US law has a security clause for mothers of natural-born American citizens that states that the government will not remove the mother from her child without serious cause. Being an illegal alien (unlike in Japan!!) usually isn't enough to cut it in most cases. It's why so many people cross the border from Latin America when the mother is already expecting. It's so that even if they get caught, if she goes into labor on American soil, bam: her kid's a natural-born citizen of the US of A.

It's easy to imagine the girl asking you to fuck her and you saying "YES PLEASE! " And in that moment of stupidity, she gets pregnant and she dumps you. Kid is born 9 months later, kid's an American citizen, she gets to stay because she's the kid's mom, and you have to pay child support because she can prove (quite easily nowadays, yay genetics!) that you're the father.


#2. "She" is not really a Japanese girl at all. "She" is an older adult pedophile looking to meet up with you and [NOT GOOD! X_X].

Actually , i speak good Japanese, just not perfect. But we talked alot already ( in Japanese) and we had great conversation about many things.

And yes she may be looking for American citizenship, but doesn't mean she will be a mean woman. She just wants to move out of Japan, and what's wrong with that? At least she doesn't want to be here illegally.

But i won't f*ck her because I'm poor, i don't have a house or nothing yet. I know i can't have a family. So i'm already aware of this and i'm sure this will come up in our later discussions.

About the pedophile thing. Well we already talked in voice, she's a woman 30 year old. My same age. And if it was a pedophile, i would just not approach her. I'd only approach if I saw she was the same woman from the picture she showed me.

Anyways, so you guys think I have no chance of success?

 

[josolopSon3]

"within the first year of marriage"

Well, I'm not marrying her yet. If we get married it would be 4 or 5 years from now.

 

[josolopSon3]

So, anyone know what the process is for bringing a Japanese lady to live to the USA?
Would i have to marry her first when she's here visiting?

 

[aquamarine]

Why not call your local govn't official rather than ask a forum of which has the main basis of supplying you with pornographic cartoons?

Just.... a thought......

(kinda like asking for legal advice after you run someone down from the users on a site like /b/)

 

[IdolFun]

So, anyone know what the process is for bringing a Japanese lady to live to the USA?
Would i have to marry her first when she's here visiting?

http://tokyo.usembassy.gov/e/acs/tacs-7114b.html

 

[bark22]

A long time ago, I was stationed in Okinawa. I met a great girl and we got engaged. At the end of my tour there I went back to the US and I applied for a fiance visa. In that case, we would have been required to get married within 90 days of her arrival to the States.
I also wasn't white and her parents, who made it an issue decided that it was not in her best interest to keep the engagement. I did not have to fork over any cash for the visa and later met a Filipina, who I've been happily married to for almost 30 years.

If you want more information about fiance visas, try this website:

http://travel.state.gov/visa/immigrants/types/types_2994.html

 

[Ceewan]

Nice link IdolFun, thank you.

Well I don't know what to say, seems like your mind is made up. You want her and if possible want to be with her. I don't think there is anything wrong with getting others opinions on the matter. I will note that you know something is wrong. That your personal situation is far from ideal,(and race doesn't mean shit!), and it is something you feel a need to change. I would suggest you let this ferment for awhile, enjoy your time online with her and work on improving your situation. Then take it slow and see where it goes.

Good luck to you!

 

[Tatsurou]

Pretty much everything that should've been said has been said. First off, you might want to try actually living with the girl for at minimum 6 months before you decide you really want to marry her. How old is she? What education does she have? Does she have a job in Japan? Do her parents have money? Does she?

If you can't find a way to pay for your own life, how are you going to pay for a Japanese immigrants? And your child (which she will want ASAP)?

 

[chrisfallout]

one other question to ask. not sure was ask have you seen in a web cam or seen picture too. also i would look into USA laws first before make up mind. not sure people here recall the old Russian bride thing too. if do not recall her snip to remind about it. for one thing they look cutie and sexy at start but as years go on they go heavy set or was just looking for away to take money and send back to homeland that are not parents of family. they would try to drain you dry all time say some back home needs help. if ask if can go back and she feed line on it. say it to far out in middle nowhere why my family live. or say no safe for me to go back but i want help all i can with out going back to cause some to get arrested or hurt. should way out good and bad. also if get chance to see person first then just talk like im or aol. you know what getting into. people love to post fake pics of self or play games with people see what can get out of them. that's my 2 cents

 

[satomimi]

I think you should avoid any negative thoughts and comments, be positive, strong minded and believe in yourself and her.

A. Forget the whole race thing, if your a positive, intelligent kind hearted person, their parents will be bound to accept you and be proud, they would be willing to open up once you can prove yourself. There is many African American singers in Japan who sing in Japanese, Jero http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jero
A friend I know in California made two films on Japan and he is African American
http://www.popcultureshock.com/akiras/
http://www.popcultureshock.com/sevendays/
Crystal Kay is Korean/African American who is in the top 5 on the music charts
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystal_Kay
http://www.sonymusic.co.jp/Music/Info/C-Kay/

I've noticed in Tokyo e that African American culture is embraced (im not African American, but I have no prejudice to any races, religions or skin colour, I judge a person as an individual, which all people on this earth should do!)

B. Forget all the stereotypes about Japanese girls, Asians etc, there is good and bad in all cultures.. I dont think anyone is perfect, if a person loves you for who you are then thats the main part, never give up always keep trying. Show dignity, intelligence and respect goes a long way in life, which Im sure you already do.

C. Find a new job that pays more, or work in Japan in IT, English teacher, other types of work, foreign acting talent, US Army.

D. Dont give up and im sure youll find a way.. if you believe in yourself. Hope to talk some time ^_^

You could also consider going to Japan on a Business Visa as its quite easy to get, its 3 years renewable, unlike Engineer and Teacher visas being 1 year then renewable. Some African Americans I saw own English teaching offices, bars, restaurants, (not the ones in Roppongi) anyway hope you look into it and take your life seriously, instead of listening to others who will sidetrack you to do the opposite with your life.. due to jealousy, ignorance and negativity

 

[desioner]

Anyways, so you guys think I have no chance of success?

Some might for their various reasons, however we honestly can't say for sure because we know nothing of you two. MY wife and I have been happily married for 3 years and I've been here in Japan for almost 6 years. I'm the one that would most like to have children but due to my wife's line of work (she's a doctor) that would make her life a little more complicated than she wants.
You two could very well turn out to be a great couple. There are so many factors that are involved that you need to think deeply about something like this before it totally ruins your life. How much dating have you done in your life? Relationships espically romantic ones should be nurtured and gradually started. I would highly recommend that you invite her over for a few months and likewise you visit Japan for as long as you can. Being with each other is so much more different than chatting/speaking with each other.
Best of luck!
desioner

 

[josolopSon3]

I've never dated before and i'm already near 30. just that i'm a shy guy.

 

[Darkonis]

Good luck I am familiar with your situation as I'm in the same. I've epilepsy so currently I'm staying with my sister I've been told that is safer for me medically speaking as it lowers the chance of serious risks to my health. Like you I've not a lot of money but I've many possibilities as I'm talented in many different areas.
If you don't mind my asking does she know of your living arrangements? I only ask cause her reaction to the news can help you to better get to know her and where her mind is at.