I am not quite sure what this thread is about but I am bored at the moment and it caught my interest while I am waiting for something to download. (Which is one of the reasons I frequent this forum, lots of interesting people and topics).
Just because all women, and men for that matter, are physically similar they don't always react to the same stimuli in a similar manner. That is one of the explanations for fetishes in general, we all have our quirks. If you are not having success getting that special someone sexually excited, experiment. Half the fun of sexual relationships are finding out what gets your partner "off" and how best to enjoy the experience. I am a bit selfish myself, I like to be in control and that works for me. I like to make a woman feel like a woman and I want her to make me feel like a man, not a tool. That being said regular sex can sometimes be a bit boring and experimentation is fun. Some girls like it rough, some like more foreplay than others, most girls like it a little kinky in one form or another. There are plenty of "how to" videos hosted here, keep trying something different until you find what works for you and your partner. And then try to expand on that sexual knowledge of what pleases you both.
So what gets a girl wet, what she likes as foreplay or gets her to cum is going to be different from partner to partner. Just be confident you can please any women you want and do your best to prove it.