Dumb Moments in JAV

darksider59

Akiba Citizen
Feb 24, 2014
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When I saw Kharo88's post, I considered adding the comment that the JAV-makers were somewhat off the hook, because they ripped off the stupid American porn series that came up with this idea; I think there was more than one, actually, but the only one that comes to my mind now is Reality King's Big Sausage Pizza (which Urban Dictionary tells us has become part of the vernacular). When I checked the particulars, I noticed that the R.K. series ran from 2010 to 2013. RCT-250 is a movie from 2010, so now we can't be sure who ripped off whom.

(Big Sausage Pizza began in August of 2010, while RCT-250 was evidently released in October. I guess my presumption was correct.)

I checked my notes to see if I had anything on RCT-250. I knew I would not have downloaded it, because of its DUMBness, but I see I had written, "REFERENCED FOR GREAT FACE ON COVER." I also had made the note that the woman with that joyful, glistening face was Emiri Momoka (whose big breasts were singled out time and again on the listed titles of her Asian Screens page). A few screen shots (and mirror) of Emiri, from RCT-250.




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With the pizza, I immediately thought about R.K as well. I remember one with Kortney Kane (back when I didn't care about fake boobs).
Kourtney-Kane-Fucking-002.jpg

 
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Motiman

Akiba Citizen
Oct 30, 2007
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Should i be worried that i am getting a real craving for pizza. :pusing: Disregarding the massive meat pole in the middle, that pic is just so appetizing! Man i'm so conflicted right now! :aghh:
 

jugulear

Akiba Citizen
Jan 20, 2012
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You are a stronger chap than I for managing to disregard the meat pole, Motiman. (Your moniker, I'm now getting the idea, may be short for Motivation-Man.)


All right... in regard to how Asian Screens titled:

Banging a Call Girl Who's Holding Onto a Rung While Standing Without Protection! Raw Cream Pies! 2 [MIST-113]

So... what am I missing?

First, I had to understand what they meant by "Rung." Only "Rung" to my knowledge (as a noun) would be a step on a ladder (and just having looked up the word, another noun-meaning turned out to be "A piece of wood or metal that is placed between the legs of a chair for support.")

I got the feeling ... perhaps they meant "ring"?

Next stop: the pikchers.

MIST-113.jpg

So she's holding on to... I guess... a ring? (I wouldn't call that a ring. A ring is the round thing you wear on your finger, or the round thing you keep your keys on. These are small round things. I guess you can call a big round thing a ring, and I further guess I need to learn English.)

So I was very bothered by that big thing being called a ring (EDIT: It later dawned on me that there are big rings to hang towels from... but I don't think the big thing in the picture, bulky as it is, was meant to be a towel ring), and then I went to R18 to see how they described the title:

Legal Public Obscenity! A Molester Fucks Delivery Health Girls From Behind While They Hold On To A Hanging Strap! Creampie Raw Footage! 2

Ahhhh, so that's a STRAP. Makes more sense. You know, a strap is what they call the thing you hold on to, in the bus or subway...

But... what, am I missing something? The screen shots I looked at for MIST-113 all presented an indoor setting.

I learned from R18 that there is a series behind this movie, with two other entries. (Boy, this idea... "Call Girl Gets Molested While She Grips The Strap - Then Fucked From Behind! And Creampied!"... must have been so popular. First one was released in June, the third only last month.) Another photo, this time from MIST-121:

MIST-121.jpg

Okay, that clinched it.

See, the first photo was really inexplicable. What is the strap hanging from? A coat rack? (I am not sure what it is, so I have not only a lot to learn about English, but about home furnishings.) But I recognized the furniture from the second photograph (please! Do not compliment me on my brilliance), and I can't think of any reason why a strap would be attached to a shelf.

So it looks like the entire gimmick for this movie (I can't even bear to accept they turned such a movie into a series) is that a lady gets reamed while holding on to a strap... a strap that has no place in a home (unless, maybe, if it's a motor home with no shock absorbers), is detachable, and could be hung from anywhere.

(The bigger question is, why would the lady be holding on to a strap? For support? If the action gets furious, I'd say the alleged coat rack or the shelf could easily keel over.)

There's a four-letter-word that can describe this lunacy, and let's say the first letter it begins with is a "D."


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Blade Runner

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Sep 12, 2015
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I nominate the Mature Dog series.

mdyd00316pl.jpg

I thought MDYD-316 was beyond dumb. Sayuri Shiraishi before she became Maki Hojo is wearing her birthday suit for the entire movie. Good. She is lead by the collar in most of the scenes. Light bondage stuff. I initially thought Maki was hypnotized because she doesn't speak a single word. She barks, whimpers, and acts like a dog :(
No scene of cast having a laugh when she awakes from trance. Maki does almost nothing erotic until 50+ minutes into the movie.

Maki Hojo is Lassie. Owner scolds son who has sex with Maki Hojo who is Lassie. Owner has sex with Maki Hojo who is Lassie. Male dog has sex with Maki Hojo who is Lassie. Woo-hoo!

Maki Tomada has at least 2 entries in this series. Yumi Kazama, Chisato Shoda, and Reiko Kobayakawa have also portrayed Lassie. Go figure.
 

Inertia

Akiba Citizen
Apr 2, 2015
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Ladies and gentlemen, the mic for this thread has been dropped. I don't think anyone here can reach as low as it fell to pick it back up.

Below is the cover art for a title coming out this month by RADIX ( http://www.up-tight.com )

The lady's 53 years old, has no money, no family, no job, so does the most insanely demeaning AV possible. There's been a recent trend of shaving woman's heads (at least in the (very) indies AV circuit) and this title took that (and more) to its most jaw-droppingly crazy conclusion.

1125.jpg
 

Supmop

Akiba Citizen
Oct 23, 2012
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whats happened in JAV don't apply with western porn mindset

JAV have made a lot of dumb, stupid, weird, crazy, disgusting porn and they will keep doing it

I see whats Inertia posted few days ago, its a very turn off AV, thanks God someone else posted it not me :D
 
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Inertia

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Apr 2, 2015
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I’m not sure how well this title will sell, but I think it’s a smart move to make it as even if it isn’t a success, it’ll definitely be attention-grabbing and thus make potential customers look at the other (and slightly more normal) titles the company makes.
 

jugulear

Akiba Citizen
Jan 20, 2012
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By the way, Blade Runner, that was an excellent call that you have made with the "Dog" series seven posts back. Reminded me of a detailed post I had put up over two years ago on dog-related JAVs, and while I could not comment in detail on this particular series (since I had brought up so many movies), one may feel my outrage through lines such as, "Almost a comedy, is what these movies amount to" ... there was potential with this series, ruined because of the filmmakers' stupidity.


.
 

Supmop

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Oct 23, 2012
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I’m not sure how well this title will sell, but I think it’s a smart move to make it as even if it isn’t a success, it’ll definitely be attention-grabbing and thus make potential customers look at the other (and slightly more normal) titles the company makes.

Radix oftenly made extreme / weird fetish videos, maybe their intention is making AV for peoples who like ugly womens ? maybe they targeting "anti mainstream" market ? :D
 
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Inertia

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Apr 2, 2015
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RADIX's niche is doing things other makers would rather not do. They're actually one of the first companies that really started pushing older women titles (jukujo). It's pretty rare for them to do something 'normal'. If the title stars a cute girl or famous actress, the theme's gonna be pretty bizarre.
 

Supmop

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Oct 23, 2012
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RADIX's niche is doing things other makers would rather not do. They're actually one of the first companies that really started pushing older women titles (jukujo). It's pretty rare for them to do something 'normal'. If the title stars a cute girl or famous actress, the theme's gonna be pretty bizarre.

yes Radix is the brand for them who like ugly and weird AV
 

Restrepo

Well-Known Member
Jul 7, 2015
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Rediscovering this thread after I did a random search of Suzuki Koharu related material and discovered @pukimai's noble, if brief, original post.

Been on quite a kick with her past few days. I always seem to gravitate largely to one girl at a time, revisiting past favorites of course, but my interest in JAV is heavily dependent on a new fascination, AIKA having been soiled for me by her clear sadness being in the industry, I'd been without a focus until Ms. Koharu came along~

I digress ~ @ding73ding, did you ever finish EBOD-513?

The moment when she manages to "fall" not only onto the stepfather, but to simultaneously fully insert herself on his penis...definitely one for this history books.

For those that haven't seen, it's not only absurd in concept, but even more in execution. It's goofier than you'd even imagine.

Anyway, the reason I bring all this back up is that it all concludes, somewhat confusingly, in that the man has indeed just been fantasizing (?) about the younger girl. The scene cuts from them in bed, to well...

Him humping the air, nothing. His wife walks in like, "Honey...what the fuck are you doing?" He is visibly shocked that he's been fucking nothing.

So many questions...if he's just been fantasizing about the younger, hotter house member, then why doesn't the wife just find him jerking off?

So we're left with...supernatural? possibilities. The daughter never existed to begin with? She's a spirit? Our hero is just f'in crazy?

All in all a truly bizarre and endlessly amusing entry into the JAV canon, with one of my current favorite hotties, to boot.

Recommend. ;)
 
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Supmop

Akiba Citizen
Oct 23, 2012
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Rediscovering this thread after I did a random search of Suzuki Koharu related material and discovered @pukimai's noble, if brief, original post.

Been on quite a kick with her past few days. I always seem to gravitate largely to one girl at a time, revisiting past favorites of course, but my interest in JAV is heavily dependent on a new fascination, AIKA having been soiled for me by her clear sadness being in the industry, I'd been without a focus until Ms. Koharu came along~

I digress ~ @ding73ding, did you ever finish EBOD-513?

The moment when she manages to "fall" not only onto the stepfather, but to simultaneously fully insert herself on his penis...definitely one for this history books.

For those that haven't seen, it's not only absurd in concept, but even more in execution. It's goofier than you'd even imagine.

Anyway, the reason I bring all this back up is that it all concludes, somewhat confusingly, in that the man has indeed just been fantasizing (?) about the younger girl. The scene cuts from them in bed, to well...

Him humping the air, nothing. His wife walks in like, "Honey...what the fuck are you doing?" He is visibly shocked that he's been fucking nothing.

So many questions...if he's just been fantasizing about the younger, hotter house member, then why doesn't the wife just find him jerking off?

So we're left with...supernatural? possibilities. The daughter never existed to begin with? She's a spirit? Our hero is just f'in crazy?

All in all a truly bizarre and endlessly amusing entry into the JAV canon, with one of my current favorite hotties, to boot.

Recommend. ;)

if someone looking for bizarre porn, they will find a lot in JAV

sometimes its really absurd, weird sometimes its fun to watch

I've downloaded this video, and watched the trailer before, I'll watch the full video later ;)

thank you for the review :)
 

ding73ding

Akiba Citizen
Oct 25, 2009
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did you ever finish EBOD-513?
...
So we're left with...supernatural? possibilities. The daughter never existed to begin with? She's a spirit? Our hero is just f'in crazy?
I did finish it, and I even believe I posted about the mysterious ending similar to your post.

I'm afraid without understand the dialogues, not just a minimal understanding, but need someone who's very fluent in Japanese and also understand western culture to translate the story. Hah I suppose one more attempt, let's feed the DMM synopsis to translate:
新妻の連れ娘の心春は何と家ではTバック一枚で過ごす少し変わった女子校生だった!義娘に欲情しちゃまずいと理性で抑えてもプリプリ桃尻が常に目の前にあ るから常にギン起ち勃起状態!そしてある事件を境にとうとうイケナイ関係に…。妻の目を盗み純白ボディと繰り広げる背徳感たっぷりのSEXの気持ち良いこ とといったらもう!
The daughter of the bride take Koharu what family was changed a little school girls spend one Thong! In that hot girl in a peach hip if I always in the wrong reason and because I always stand in front of Leucaena erection! And at last, at the event's relationship. Steal his wife's eyes, pure white body of a lot of SEX immorality feeling and feeling good and more!
Well that's no help, it's only telling the opening theme, not the final explanation. Understandable but no help.

Well partly due to difficulty to get a reliable explanation, partly... well in the end, I care only about the sex (1) the raw physical aspect, hot girl, hot guy, hot action, camera angle, lighting etc (2) the kinky mental aspect, fantasy of free eye candy of a young girl, the only-slightly-guilty feeling of seducing the step-daughter, both aspect work out fine for me. So I'm enjoying the vid but given up any wish to find out the real story. But I do note that in the end it's slightly less satisfactory if the whole vid is a dream/fantasy sequence (after all these years I still hate the mad dream sequence in original Macross). Better if it's a fantasized slapstick "reality", like in particular, Koharu scared by a cockroach while wearing a panty/thong, fell on the naked stepfather, but in that split second her panty was pulled aside so she plugs his penis in her pussy as she lands. Totally impossible in real life, but I'd like it better if it's a fantasized reality, rather than a realistic fantasy (that happened only in his head).

The same way I watch Ghostbusters as a movie of a fantasized reality not a private dream sequence happening in Peter Venkman's head.

Can anyone recommend other vids with such ... let's say humor, in JAV?

If you are in a Suzuki Koharu mood, check out her new release KAWD-744 万引き女子校生に今から罰を与えます。 鈴木心春 Shoplifting school girl punishment. I haven't watched it yet (hopefully tonight) but another vid TEAM-079 with a very similar title (but different girl and studio) was pretty good.
 
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Restrepo

Well-Known Member
Jul 7, 2015
557
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@ding73ding

Not really sticking to the topic briefly, but I watched KAWD-744 yesterday. When I'm "on" one girl I download essentially everything they release as soon as it releases haha.

It's solid. First scene is probably the best, but then again I didn't watch the rest in as interested in a mood heh. For another time.

Back on topic, I agree the ending, assuming it is saying it was all in his head, takes away from it. I want the fantasy, however absurd, to be "real".