Dumb Moments in JAV

Supmop

Akiba Citizen
Oct 23, 2012
3,955
1,923
.
Elf fantasy?

View attachment 596254

View attachment 596255

What's so hot about that??

Oh, wait; maybe you meant the LORD OF THE RINGS lady?

View attachment 596253

Well, technically that's not porn... do I need to look this up?

http://www.tokyokinky.com/elf-porn-japan-fantasy-adult-movie-soft-on-demand/

Ohhh... actually, I have run into this curiosity in the past...

The Elf does not speak. Dainty, puckish - as petite as can be. She has been developed by engineers from the Japanese adult movie world to be the play thing of men: To lick what is put in front of her, to accept what is "given" to her... In short, to be the cutest elfish girl you could ever imagine. Now see this imp on a threesome that she will never forget!

View attachment 596256

Thought that was a one-time thing... I didn't know it was a "thing"...


.

don't put that male elves, we are straight here :D

yes close to LOTR female elves ;)

ID-24017.jpg
 

jchouktv

Member
Jun 8, 2012
91
48
L59Tkpo.png


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I mean... what the hell ??

(first scene of AGEMIX-282)
 

leebar

Active Member
Feb 27, 2013
175
91
On the cover, is this a typo? A Japanese-to-English pronunciation stereo-typo?

Please don't tell me it was supposed to read "ENDLESS BLACKHOLE"... !
dxeb-003_poster.jpg
 

ding73ding

Akiba Citizen
Oct 25, 2009
2,337
2,092
On the cover, is this a typo? A Japanese-to-English pronunciation stereo-typo?

Please don't tell me it was supposed to read "ENDLESS BLACKHOLE"... !

Absolutely, the yellow font Japanese right below the "ENDRESS BLACKHOLE" is exactly "~ Endless black hole ~ vol 3"

It's hardly worth making a fuss about, for long time JAV or J-culture fans. Japanese don't make distinction between L and R, their ラ, リ, ル, レ, ロ, (Ra, Ri, Ru. Re, Ro) Romanize with R's but if you listen carefully, sound almost exactly half way between Ra, Ri, Ru, Re, Ro and La, Li, Lu, Le, Lo. L/R mistakes are stereotypos, quite indeed.

Most of the time, when Japanese toss English translations into an entertainment product, it's not at all for the benefit of foreigners. The real purpose is to impart an exotic style or impressions on the domestic customers, whose English level isn't good enough to detect these mistakes.
 

leebar

Active Member
Feb 27, 2013
175
91
Japanese don't make distinction between L and R, their ラ, リ, ル, レ, ロ, (Ra, Ri, Ru. Re, Ro) Romanize with R's but if you listen carefully, sound almost exactly half way between Ra, Ri, Ru, Re, Ro and La, Li, Lu, Le, Lo. L/R mistakes are stereotypos, quite indeed.

FASCINATING explanation, ding73ding!
I'd never heard that. Thank you for enlightning us.

I just figured it was a stereotype promoted by 1940s-era Hollywood which used it as an unflattering, shorthand way to identify WWII bad guys, like music played in 5ths. Of course, stereotypes don't come into existence without some evidence or recurrence.
 
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Motiman

Akiba Citizen
Oct 30, 2007
1,248
1,259
In terms of dumb moments in JAV i think this whole movie has to qualify under the whole 'dumb' term and yet it still has the capacity to excite, most probably due to the ultra cuteness of Kokomi Naruse and the fact that the makers really went the extra mile to make it look genuinely like the comic manga it's based on, made by one of my all time favourite authors Kondom.

SACE-086 "I'm Just A Door Knob..." Pussy Keyhole

1sace00086pl.jpg

Like i say, Kokomi Naruse is the absolute definition of cute in this movie.

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h36m09s582.jpg

Based on a rather short comic, somehow they've managed to create a 90 minute movie from it and boy is it a doozy! Right from the first scene as doorknob Kokomi patiently awaits her owner to come back from work (we even have pages of the comic to help explain the story), until she finally gets rewarded with what i can only describe as a 'keying'. :eek:

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h36m32s540.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h36m46s932.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h37m04s311.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h37m17s494.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h37m51s394.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h38m04s509.jpg

The movie even has some sadness as poor little Kokomi-knob gets upset when she hears the tenant is soon moving out (i think). Yup, we even get tears from our sad little heroine. :(

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h58m39s828.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h58m59s448.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h59m08s179.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-01h59m43s639.jpg

Not to worry though as we quickly learn the next guy is a world class pervo, who enjoys nothing more than spying on woman from his spyhole and jerking off. Well what's poor little Kokoknobi going to do faced with this giant dong in her face? Her initial revulsion is clear to see but soon enough she has grown fond of her new phallic companion and is soon helpfully jerking him off. Now of course all actions have consequences and, lo and behold, she is soon faced with a mighty spunking, leaving her pretty little head covered all over! :p

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h04m15s542.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h05m04s386.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h05m15s248.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h05m23s860.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h05m51s674.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h06m02s204.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h06m14s067.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h06m33s942.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h06m49s135.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h07m01s993.jpg

The spooging has clearly had an effect on young Knobomi and soon she is soon all loved up and daydreaming of her new 'lover' and so we get a fantasy sequence whereby her now down to size guy is able to make real love to her (although she still remains stuck to her door) and we are left watch him grope and suck his way over her lovely boobies before a quick blowjob soon has him unloading all over her pretty face! :oops:

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h22m12s684.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h22m36s628.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h23m00s484.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h23m41s821.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h23m24s043.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h24m10s209.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h24m17s337.jpg

Of course it's not over there and we now have our horny loser on the other side of the door, facing her sweet peach of an ass! :oops: Man he is all over that thing, licking, fondling, groping and fingering her to a satisfying climax, at which point he helps himself and his weiner by taking her doggystyle through the door. :) Kokomi is so cute as an actress, and that's not just her looks but also the sweet little moans she gives out as she gets drilled, boy i wish she was still active! :rolleyes:

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h32m00s046.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h32m52s488.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h33m38s516.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h33m48s258.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h34m11s349.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h34m28s139.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h35m00s017.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h35m25s018.jpg

All's well good and happy then, eh? Sadly not, as we get, shock horror! :eek:, a thief with full lock pick gear is soon on the scene! :confused: What's his motive? No bloody idea, but our little Koknobomi soon has to deal with a good going over with a pair of giant tools. Again big credit to the makers for going to the effort of building these props :). I really hope they went to to some outside company to have these created, i'd love to know if the makers had to explain what they were intended for. :p Luckily she is saved from the giant drill grinding it's way through her pussy and our plucky thief is chased away. I do wonder what he intended to steal? I mean the pervert looked like a pure bum but i guess he could have helped himself to a mountain of porn! ;)

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h44m01s776.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h44m16s268.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h44m33s540.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h45m02s874.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h45m23s435.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h45m38s446.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h45m49s155.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h46m24s500.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h46m37s311.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-02h47m31s181.jpg

Really tempted to get this masterpiece translated, what do you think?

vlcsnap-2016-03-29-03h01m28s795.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-03h01m36s426.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-03h02m20s229.jpg vlcsnap-2016-03-29-03h02m40s359.jpg
 

kharo88

Akiba Citizen
Sep 13, 2015
1,345
1,027
In terms of dumb moments in JAV i think this whole movie has to qualify under the whole 'dumb' term and yet it still has the capacity to excite, most probably due to the ultra cuteness of Kokomi Naruse and the fact that the makers really went the extra mile to make it look genuinely like the comic manga it's based on, made by one of my all time favourite authors Kondom.

SACE-086 "I'm Just A Door Knob..." Pussy Keyhole

View attachment 639943

Like i say, Kokomi Naruse is the absolute definition of cute in this movie.

View attachment 639945

Based on a rather short comic, somehow they've managed to create a 90 minute movie from it and boy is it a doozy! Right from the first scene as doorknob Kokomi patiently awaits her owner to come back from work (we even have pages of the comic to help explain the story), until she finally gets rewarded with what i can only describe as a 'keying'. :eek:

View attachment 639946 View attachment 639947 View attachment 639948 View attachment 639949 View attachment 639950 View attachment 639951

The movie even has some sadness as poor little Kokomi-knob gets upset when she hears the tenant is soon moving out (i think). Yup, we even get tears from our sad little heroine. :(

View attachment 639952 View attachment 639953 View attachment 639954 View attachment 639955

Not to worry though as we quickly learn the next guy is a world class pervo, who enjoys nothing more than spying on woman from his spyhole and jerking off. Well what's poor little Kokoknobi going to do faced with this giant dong in her face? Her initial revulsion is clear to see but soon enough she has grown fond of her new phallic companion and is soon helpfully jerking him off. Now of course all actions have consequences and, lo and behold, she is soon faced with a mighty spunking, leaving her pretty little head covered all over! :p

View attachment 639956 View attachment 639957 View attachment 639958 View attachment 639959 View attachment 639960 View attachment 639961 View attachment 639962 View attachment 639963 View attachment 639964 View attachment 639965

The spooging has clearly had an effect on young Knobomi and soon she is soon all loved up and daydreaming of her new 'lover' and so we get a fantasy sequence whereby her now down to size guy is able to make real love to her (although she still remains stuck to her door) and we are left watch him grope and suck his way over her lovely boobies before a quick blowjob soon has him unloading all over her pretty face! :oops:

View attachment 639966 View attachment 639967 View attachment 639968 View attachment 639969 View attachment 639970 View attachment 639971 View attachment 639972

Of course it's not over there and we now have our horny loser on the other side of the door, facing her sweet peach of an ass! :oops: Man he is all over that thing, licking, fondling, groping and fingering her to a satisfying climax, at which point he helps himself and his weiner by taking her doggystyle through the door. :) Kokomi is so cute as an actress, and that's not just her looks but also the sweet little moans she gives out as she gets drilled, boy i wish she was still active! :rolleyes:

View attachment 639973 View attachment 639974 View attachment 639975 View attachment 639976 View attachment 639977 View attachment 639978 View attachment 639979 View attachment 639980

All's well good and happy then, eh? Sadly not, as we get, shock horror! :eek:, a thief with full lock pick gear is soon on the scene! :confused: What's his motive? No bloody idea, but our little Koknobomi soon has to deal with a good going over with a pair of giant tools. Again big credit to the makers for going to the effort of building these props :). I really hope they went to to some outside company to have these created, i'd love to know if the makers had to explain what they were intended for. :p Luckily she is saved from the giant drill grinding it's way through her pussy and our plucky thief is chased away. I do wonder what he intended to steal? I mean the pervert looked like a pure bum but i guess he could have helped himself to a mountain of porn! ;)

View attachment 639981 View attachment 639982 View attachment 639983 View attachment 639984 View attachment 639985 View attachment 639986 View attachment 639987 View attachment 639988 View attachment 639989 View attachment 639990

Really tempted to get this masterpiece translated, what do you think?

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I think you should write more reviews! :D

That film is so ridiculous, so Japanese, if you don't mind me phrasing it like that... but yes, Kokomi Naruse is cute! Isn't she always? :)
 

jugulear

Akiba Citizen
Jan 20, 2012
2,769
2,312
.
Imaginative... fantastic. Evidently, well depicted as a movie, too. Thank you, Motiman, for not only bringing this to attention, but for explaining the goings-on so beautifully.


.
 

fruxano

Member
Nov 1, 2008
52
39
That film is so ridiculous, so Japanese, if you don't mind me phrasing it like that... but yes, Kokomi Naruse is cute! Isn't she always? :)

Yeah, I always had a thing for her. Her works were never really that exciting to me nor did she have the greatest body (not to say that it was bad though), but her face and cuteness are off the charts.
Too bad she retired though. Didn't she get an STD, or am I thinking of someone else?
 

kharo88

Akiba Citizen
Sep 13, 2015
1,345
1,027
Yeah, I always had a thing for her. Her works were never really that exciting to me nor did she have the greatest body (not to say that it was bad though), but her face and cuteness are off the charts.
Too bad she retired though. Didn't she get an STD, or am I thinking of someone else?

I agree, I'm the same way when it comes to her! As for her getting some kind of STD, I don't know. I don't follow any JAV actress apart from checking what films they put out. Sorry!
 

Motiman

Akiba Citizen
Oct 30, 2007
1,248
1,259
Yeah, I always had a thing for her. Her works were never really that exciting to me nor did she have the greatest body (not to say that it was bad though), but her face and cuteness are off the charts.
Too bad she retired though. Didn't she get an STD, or am I thinking of someone else?

That's a shame to hear though i still live in hope for a comeback.
 

Supmop

Akiba Citizen
Oct 23, 2012
3,955
1,923
Yeah, I always had a thing for her. Her works were never really that exciting to me nor did she have the greatest body (not to say that it was bad though), but her face and cuteness are off the charts.
Too bad she retired though. Didn't she get an STD, or am I thinking of someone else?

sorry I don't follow your previous post, who is that you think get STD ?
 

jugulear

Akiba Citizen
Jan 20, 2012
2,769
2,312
.
Let's bear in mind many porn actors have sexually transmitted diseases... as do many civilians. There is a wide range of STDs, and not all STDs are lethal. (Although there is not a single one that anybody would want.)

The following is not "chuckle-chuckle" DUMB but "this is stupid" DUMB!

CEAD-002-1.jpg

I ran into a series called "r***ing By Brother-In-Law," which sounds like nothing out of the unusual. Yet check out R18's (partial) plot description for the first of the four movies (CEAD-002, with Riri Nakayama):

When she has sex with her husband, she thinks back to the pleasure she had when her brother in law forced her to fuck him... Riri told him "No", but he just kept coming. Her husband was asleep right next to her, and she had her brother in law's cock in her mouth. As she gasps for air while getting fucked, her husband wakes up and joins in for a threesome! ...

CEAD-120-2.jpg

This is an outrage!

I see the same plot gimmick has been utilized for the next two entries in the series; for the second one, CEAD-120, with Sara Saijo:

CEAD-120-1.jpg

We get the usual action, where the wife-stealer, this time the brother-in-law... a fairly common culprit in the annals of JAV... goes about the business of getting his claws on another man's woman.

CEAD-002-2.jpg

And then when the husband finally finds out that his own brother... and his own wife... have been cheating on him, he JOINS IN???

What man would do that? I mean, really... I've heard of brotherly love, but...

I've just downloaded one, the last one in the series, the recently released CEAD-147 with Yayoi Amano... and based on a fast-forwarding, it looks like the ridiculous "ménage à bro" element has been wisely dispensed with.


EDIT:
On the other side of the coin, an outcome that may be far too real:
Violated Sister in Law Maki Hojo -[JUC-151].jpg
Maki Hojo is the Violated Sister in Law [JUC-151], and her husband (Bad Bald Bastard, playing against type) finds out!

Violated Sister in Law Maki Hojo -[JUC-151]-2.jpg
He confronts the bad brother-in-law, played by Moptop...

Violated Sister in Law Maki Hojo -[JUC-151]-3.jpg
...And gets stabbed to death!

.
 
Last edited:

kharo88

Akiba Citizen
Sep 13, 2015
1,345
1,027
LOVE-231 Shall Be Punished By Imprisonment Of Ochimusha Cropped Skinhead Confession Live Is Not Active Underground Idol SakuraMimi CD Sales Quota Achievement.

pp_246729.jpg


:gaswat:

I don't understand... So, first things first. Did she have to have her head shaved because her CDs didn't sell well or did she do it to boost her sales? I'm not exactly clear on that. Either way, this seems really dumb to me. She could have done something that's a lot sexier. I mean, who is she going to appeal to with that haircut and the shaven head? I can't imagine many people having a fetish like that and I haven't come across any other films like this either, but who knows... You know, I would be really curious as to how well this title sold!